Plan Meets Reality - Another Day

Tuesday started out at 530 when Kassie decided to wake up. So I have been up since then. Why do teeth have to hurt so much when they come in. On the plus side Lucas started a load of laundry (I think he needed pants or something) so I started the dishes. I hate that just one bad day (Monday) can turn my whole house upside down. So I decided I was not going to sit down until the boys left for school which is at 715. I was able to do a full load of dishes, clean counters, sweep and make the bed. I was feeling really good about the day, then Kassie started to show that she had been up since 530 and my body reminded me that I have not really slept in a few days so we went back to bed around 8.

What started out as a highly productive day went down hill from there. Apparently one can only go without sleep for so long before it catches up with them. I struggled with a migraine the rest of the day and didn't get much else done however thanks to the burst of energy in the morning it didn't get worse. Some days it's important that things just don't get worse.

Plan Meet Reality

Yesterday while I was going through one of my notebooks I found where I had sketched out what my morning should look like. I just shake my head, true it's what it should look like, how it should flow but seriously what was I thinking.

The Plan

All this is based on a 10pm bedtime.

6-615      Get up/Get dressed to shoes, make bed, clothes to the laundry room and start a load of laundry

615-630  Enjoy a cup of coffee with a bagel/have quiet time

630         Wake the boys up

630-7     Put dishes away/make lunches/gather clothes and pick up bathroom

700        Reboot Laundry/Enjoy another cup of coffee

715        Boys leave for bus stop

730-8    Work out

8-830    Shower/Dressed for the day/finish chores

830-9    Kassie up/Make breakfast/clean up kitchen

9-11      Run Errands, go visit Lucas

12         Lunch

1-3       Kassie down for a nap/more chores/finish laundry

3           Boys home

The Reality

I went to bed at 9 last night, read a little bit and lights were off at 10. Unfortunately for some reason I did not sleep last night. Kassie woke at midnight (I had not fallen asleep yet) then again at 3am. At 3am I had just dozed. I brought her out to the living room until she fell back asleep.

600    
The Alarm goes off, I really just want to throw it across the room, except that I remember that my alarm is my kindle fire and I am quite fond of it so I don't. I do however turn it off and roll back over.

615    
Kassie wakes up and starts kicking me. She is never up this early, not a good sign.

625
Pour a cup of coffee, wondering how many cups I am going to need today. Make the boys lunch, I know once I sit down to drink my coffee it doesn't look good for anything else.

630
Wake the boys up, thankful it was not a battle this morning. I would let them sleep but they have to leave to catch the bus at 715. I used to walk them down to the bus stop but Kassie is usually still asleep right now.

700
The boys are dressed and ready to go, I am blogging and playing facebook games to try and stay awake. I am exhausted and on my second cup of coffee. I don't think it's going to help today. Kassie looks like she wants to go back to sleep, I think that is a good idea, just have to wait until the boys leave for school.

715
Boys leave. I reset my alarm and head back to bed. I need a reboot today.

730
Back to bed. Set alarm. Kassie goes down pretty easy.

830
Alarm didn't go off (it was set for 9) but I woke up to Kassie handing me things off my night stand. Guess she decided it was time to get up.

830-930
Another cup of coffee, breakfast and some Kassie cuddles. I keep looking at this laundry that needs to get folded and think I might do it today.

945
decide I should get up off the couch, I need to get ready for the day, I have an ortho appt and a dental cleaning. Here goes.

950
Finally head to the shower. I went to get up before and Kassie came and cuddled with me some more. It's really a wonder I get anything done. So much for leaving at 10.

1015
Ready to go, surprised really. Kassie decided to join me in the shower but now we are both dressed and ready to go. I even took the time put on a little make up.

1100
Running late of course. Dropped Lucas off his lunch and Kassie at Charlie's. Got to my appointment 10 mins late but they got me in. Think I hit mostly red lights. Got good news at the ortho. I go back in three weeks to talk about possibly taking my braces off.

1130
Dentist appointment isn't until 12 but really had nothing else to do so I decided to head that way early. Early doesn't happen for me much these days. I figured I could read and relax. Their 11 was a no show so they got me in.

100
Since I was able to get in to the dentist early I picked up Kassie and was home by one. We had pbj's for lunch and laid down.

130-245
Nap - Unfortunantly I never fell asleep. I am exhausted.

3
Dropped Timmy off at Speech and headed back to the ortho. I had something come undone and needed to get it fixed.

425
Went to pick Timmy up only to find him throwing a massive tantrum. I was extremely surprised with myself as I remained calm because calm was not what I was thinking. He had thrown his shoes and coat off and was refusing to do what he was suppose to. Seriously? Not what I wanted to deal with today.

455
Was suppose to have a half an hour to throw dinner in the oven but basically had five minutes. Hope it turns out okay.

520
Late to swim practice, one of these days I will be on time or is that asking too much. I was able to sit and take a breath. Kassie is starting to stay on the bleachers during practice, it's been a journey but I think she is starting to get it.

630
Back at home, surprised that dinner is not burnt. Serve it up and it actually tastes pretty good. Basically I made turkey burger meat loaf. Was very surprised when Kassie ate it, she doesn't eat meat.

So I took it easy the rest of the night. I think I tried to head to bed about 830. Finally dozed about 930. Woke up excited that I slept but then discovered it was only 1130.

Didn't get anything done but that happens somedays. There is always tomorrow right?

My New Year

A new year symbolizes new beginnings. It's a time for evaluation and reflection. Where are we, how did we get here and is the path that we are on still the right one for us. How is it a new beginning when we have traveled this road before. We've stood in this same exact spot, sometimes moving forward just to take a wrong turn and end up at the beginning, other times we stand frozen stuck in time, convinced that doing nothing will maintain the status quo. The problem with that view is that even if we stay still the world around us is always changing, always moving and can leave us in the dust.

So my resolutions?

Some of these goals are the same from last year, and some are new. So how do we survive more than a few weeks with our new goals? We use our goals as a map. We check our map on a weekly basis, or better yet we let someone else hold it and check in with us. We are not designed to travel this world alone and I do not believe any of these journeys or goals that we set are best met alone. We need and are best successful when we surround ourselves with a support system. Even a simple, "Hey how are you doing with your goal?" can mean a world of difference between success and failure. 

So this year I share my goals with my circle. I admit that I cannot do this by myself. I admit that I am tired of standing still and watching the world move forward while I do not. I am tired of the status quo. I want to move forward. I am ready for a change.

P-52

One of my goals for 2013 is to spend more time behind my camera. One would think for a photographer that would be easy but it isn't always that simple. I take photos of my clients and my family but that is usually where it stops. I want to break out of my box. I want to take the next step. So I decided to start a photo challenge. I have been doing a winter challenge for a few weeks and love it.  There are so many to choose from, there is the 365 challenge which I felt would be too much but I could do a photo a week challenge. That is what led me to start up P-52 on Facebook. I am excited to get started.

The first week's theme was to do a self-portrait. This is something I struggle with as I do not feel that I am photogenic but I put aside my insecurities and did it anyway. I deleted several right off the bat and ended up with this one. Not sure what the other themes are going to be as they are being decided right now but I am ready.